Wednesday, April 25, 2012

My Introduction

At some point it just hit me, "the world is hilarious." I think it actually hit me at rock bottom, when all my expectations regarding marriage, motherhood, friendship, and family flew out my ear and landed in a puddle of someone else's tequila vomit. This world is hilarious.
It's the dark times, the imperfection, the middle of the night crazed and incoherent text wars, the screaming children in the backseat, the poop on the wall moments that crack me up. Imperfection unites!

I am thirty something (I'm not scared of telling you my age, I just don't want to update this every year, as I am very lazy). I am divorced. I am a momma to an 11 year old female genius child and a hysterical, cuddle bug, male 4 year old. (Crap, I'm going to have to update THEIR ages, so I might as well tell you I'm 33). They think I'm perfect or at least they lead me to believe they do, which is very nice of them. We are a helluva trio! I have a bf who I met on Facebook and after teasing him that he was Norman Rockwell perfect and made me want to puke for over 2 years, he somehow ended up writing sweet nothings on my bathroom mirror and leaving his underwear in my hamper. We now struggle with a combined 23 years of bad marital habits, an hour and 15 minute drive and 4 collective kids in our quest to live happily ever after. I work full-time (which I'm not allowed to talk about, because this IS the internet and I need my job). Those stories I share only with my BFF, the most hysterical, 6-month's sober, slightly raunchy, unimaginably loving mom I've found in this new rural town. I just asked her if I could discuss her online and she replied "Hellz Bellz!" So there goes her anonymity. In this town at least.

I write what I write with love and excitement. I approach the Universe like an excited puppy, I wanna play, I'll probably hump your leg, I might pee a little but REALLY, REALLY I just wanna love you and have you pet my head once in a while. Even virtually.


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